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codes and secret longing

by Raised By Swans

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Gabriel Brunelle
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Gabriel Brunelle Heard of you from the movie, Chloe. Bad movie; good music. Favorite track: violet light.
Steven Eakman
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Steven Eakman Haunting, textured, atmospheric, with doses of power and drive where needed. Beautiful stuff. Everybody should hear this record. Favorite track: scent.
Nino
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Nino There's only a few albums that I can say I enjoy whole heartedly from the start to finish. So it really isn't an slight compliment for me to say, that even after a numerous plays this still intrigues me every single time.
This isn't the kind of album you just put playing on the background, when you play it, it sucks you right into it's atmosphere. I'd say it's a masterpiece!:D Favorite track: still inside you.
Michael Zielinski
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Michael Zielinski When i cry....thankyou Favorite track: unrequited /stolen lakes.
Brittany Stone
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Brittany Stone This gorgeous debut album is captivating from beginning to end. Favorite track: unrequited /stolen lakes.
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1.
dreamt a cipher in a foreign sky a signal fire an island bled by thieves and liars and i know i'll always miss her so
2.
violet light 05:03
i don't feel it i don't feel it anymore the city drowns itself heard the sirens from the shore i won't suffer this i won't suffer this for you fields of orchids burn and left here standing, frozen through your star through the scars through the scars i'll find your light again dreaming it's cheap as apathy the future atrophies the more i dream still i crawl inside your grave for those lost november days your star through the scars through the scars i'll find your light again
3.
memory uninvited enemy uninvited you you will deny the traps you fall into you'll try to hide the crack in your spine that tells me you're untrue and there is no escape so why keep trying
4.
my love what have you done with all the time i thought i had come back don't desert me a cut from a cataleptic past you're still the most peculiar one i was bent on making you believe you were wrong and baby you played along and i couldn't set you free you had to save yourself is it too late lost in some haunted place where the lights end i've gone blind here surrendered all my fear in your arms again in your black hole love your blackmail love i will not protest i will not second guess i will not resist just like all the rest
5.
sandcastles 03:45
castle by the ocean water slow to break you down i'm here skipping stones i should have known this love would drown 'cause they'll destroy you before too long the tides conspire a million strong but you're holding on you keep holding on castle by the ocean you were sold out i never learn fireworks bleed in slow bloom above the tidepools the colours blur and they'll destroy you before too long the tides conspire a million strong but you're holding on you keep holding on it's the same old ending it's still a lie i saw the jetstreams bruise the sky
6.
i'm still inside you your supernova intravenous sliding serpentine through miles of empty hallways i am always needing something i'm still inside you your glowing ocean phosphorescent hold me closer as the lights unfold below us did you notice i was breathing underwater dripping down my fingers slipping through my fingers i can't say if i'd only had my way like a moth inside a flame all my choices had been made
7.
she says i dread the line between the highs and lows and i know she'll break her little arms from following too close and though she seemed like the type that believed in her own hype i couldn't say no i can't say no so draw your line now my angel parasite call off your love feel me where the shellshocked mind begins your phantom limb you've taken secret names not knowing that they're mine you offered me protection then chained me at your side and though it seems like you've cornered me laying landmines at my feet i won't let go i can't let go no more trust now you're an accident like me call off your love feel me where the sunlight burns the skin your phantom limb nothing is ever enough
8.
relentless 04:03
your voice hit me so hard and so fast and so far i've been drawn in by your eyes i'm helpless i'm helpless and do you feel me too? i'm fading and nearly used up i'm alive inside a lie you're waiting to be accused of can you make me a promise that you'll never promise if you're careless you'll swear this moment could be always and do you feel me too? i'm fading and nearly used up i'm alive inside a lie i'm waiting to be accused of relentless
9.
lately you've been gathering fragments pictures, anecdotes all in the hopes of substance quieting echoes ghosts who've kissed your hands then cut your throat 'cause maybe then her love could sleep in autumn starlight cold and deep but still the bombs drop every night imagined life honing these questions like sharpening knives lined up like x-ray machines in my mind a man in a room and a girl in the sky why can't you just try? i'll stay silent if you want me to swear i've never heard of you no one needs to know i'm just an apparition who fatally imagined you motives of my own
10.
nothing's changing i'm just rearranging words trying to convince myself that this eclipse will shed some sun it's all wrong maybe i've been lost too long so if you don't mind i'll just stay here a while in this reckless bliss it's the moment that i'll miss and so my broken friend we'll catch the last the supernova sent you die within a dream so desperate to believe it makes you new but it's not true maybe there's nothing we can do so if you don't mind i'll just stay here a while in this reckless bliss it's the moment that i'll miss
11.
scent 06:34
by the end of the summer you were so alive and your essence seductive as hope before it died so we fell into winter what a senseless fall it was all i could do to feel the cold at all and your instincts die all cramped up inside like barely breathing butterflies and it split the sky when her scent was mine now you lose yourself as time goes by kept her heartbeat under my thumb as i drank her in all the longing smeared like embers on her skin thought you'd made an impression but i pushed your hand away just another possession destined to decay and your instincts die all cramped up inside just like barely breathing butterflies and it split the sky when her scent was mine now we lose ourselves as time goes by
12.
the more i see the more i cease to be the more you come the more i come undone undone i'm melting on your tongue and swallowed down into your underground so sterilize the instruments anaesthetize your innocence a chance to fade the fingerprints you lose yourself in excess the more i feel the more i feel unreal the setting sky the nightmare flashing by don't stop this might be all we've got and in this darkness i'm all the things i'm not wake up drag the morning for your love
13.
i can imagine you spreading your wings out in the snow and as the morphine drips the scenery shifts to somewhere i've never known thinking this could be real that maybe my dreaming wasn't in vain but as i approach your side our words collide you're fading you fade away and it feels like it's closer every year and it feels like all the torture you've survived on heaven and earth was contrived a failure but still life, or stillbirth i'm yours to take apart i can imagine you spreading your wings out in the snow and as the morphine drips you move your lips the meaning lost in code and somewhere in the night your chemicals ignite you've waited all this time you've wasted all my time and it feels like i'm closer every year

credits

released April 11, 2005

raised by swans is eric howden

all music and lyrics written, arranged and produced by eric howden
recorded at the house of miracles by andy magoffin
mixed by eric and andy
mastered by andy magoffin
artwork layout/design assistance by jesse buchanan
artwork concept/design by eric howden
inside panel artwork by antranik tchalekian
cover art inspired by and dedicated with love and respect to 'grave of the fireflies', written and directed by isao takahata
all songs © eric howden (raised by swans), 2005

performance credits:

eric howden - electric and acoustic guitars, all tracks; lead and harmony vocals, all tracks; bass guitar, all tracks; piano, organs and keyboards, all tracks; iron lung loop, track 09; dial tone, track 12

brady parr - drums

chris donais - additional guitar, tracks 3, 5, 6, 10, 11, 12

for lost friends

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